Up..down..up ...down


Really after all this packing, taping,squating, lifting, carrying, going up and down the stairs 50 million times this weekend .....I should be able to bounce a quarter off my ass! Not the case , still jiggles! Speaking of jiggles.....I would expect my arm to stop waving when I do, after a soild year of working out I would think I should be tone! But no , still have that waggle in my wave! I'll have to ask "boyfriend " at the gym when I train on Friday, before I reach the wanting to scratch his eyeballs out part of my workout!So about 5 mintues after I get there should be good!

Slacker came by last night with a goodie bag full of things to remember her by! So sweet! A piggie jar full of chocolates, yummm for my chocolate fix. A Salsa cardio DVD incase I can't find a Zumba class to go to! Best part of that is I could look like a frog in a blender, in the privacy of my own home, a piggie mug, a piggie oinking key chain. And the best of the best is a mug with her very own SLACKERISMS! She even added a few new ones! Here are a few.....
*DIET is a bad 4 letter word ..never say it!
*EXERCISE an 8 letter word- twice as bad as saying the 4 letter word!
*There is a STOP button on exercise machines for a reason 30 MINUTES!
AND my FAVORITE....
*Just because it says ONE SIZE FITS ALL doesn't mean it is intended to be worn BY ALL!

Gotta say...Slacker is truely one of a kind! Full of wisdom, a tad deluisonal, and funny as SH.....



You win some you lose some..........


I know it's not about winning, and kids need to learn to be good losers not sore losers. I have decided that people who say that don't have a drama king child, or they never lose! We had the scouts space derby today, and Caleb was whining from the time he saw the trophy's on the table until we left! They had 5 trophy's on the table, 1st, 2nd and 3rd place, Most creative and Best Design. So for a group that doesn't focus on "Winning" we have trophy's GREAT! This will be FAB-U-LOUS! Caleb was rocket 26 out of 27, watching the rockets zoom by (at least a few did) he walks up to be to tell me he won't win, he wants to go home, blah blah blah.......

Here we are rocket 26.......... finally it's our turn to race and the rocket flies....I mean really flies by! Wow I was amazed and so was Caleb! He ended up in the final 4 after his rocket won 3 races! I was so proud of him ....and then came more whining......it's endless! I'm not gonna win.....more blah blah blah.... seriously the child has no sportsmanship!I don't know who he learns that from I'm a good sport , probably cause I never win! So is his dad...well unless some kid is cheating at soccer then he's not!

So I close my eyes for a moment and started to pray, I was at church today so I should still have an open line right? I thought I might be struck by lighting because I was praying he would win that trophy because I don't think I could handle the drama and endless whining that would come with losing! I know it's not very "Mom sportsmanship" to pray for someone elses kid to loss and maybe I'll be struck down tomorrow by lighting but THANK YOU LORD that he won 3rd place and took home a trophy!I'll take my punishment for hoping someone else lost tomorrow...but for today we will take home the 3rd place trophy!




Busy as a bee..........


We have been busy, busy , busy! The last few days have been filled with packing, and purging! I even snuck over to the store to get a few pairs of shorts....since I am practically naked thanks to Squirt convincing me to get rid of the clothes that don't fit! I had a final exam....at some point in life I hope to be done with school , but I can proudly say I got a 100%! Yea me....

As for my new goal to runa 5k I signed up for a training session with "boyfriend" AKA the hottie personal trainer at the gym. 5:30 a.m on Friday! Wow I know right.......... it's that determation thing I got going right now!I made it to the gym last week 4 times at 5:30 a.m., it's a tad lonely and I still suck at running! The plan is he will teach me how to breathe and RUN at the same time! Like I always say I am no expert , but I think it's important to do both!

I envision my workout going pretty much like the personal trainer joke that's been around for years......Monday - thinks it'll be fantastic...Tuesday...feeling great...Wednesday...getting irrated by the smile ..Thursday.....hating everything about working out....and Friday ....wanting the trainer to DIE! The only difference is the instead of a week long training session mine will be an hour at 5:30 a.m.! As I write this I am thinking that I maybe delisonal! And by 6:30 a.m. I will have a new name for "boyfriend" at they gym! Oh dear....what was I thinking!

The Naked Truth.....


Me an my big mouth! Chatten on the phone to my girlfriend Squirt I mentioned , that I didn't know what to do with all the clothes in my closet! Nothing fits! She asked why and I told her they were too big! And I realize that is a good thing! So of course she told me to donate it! I was baffled "What if I get fat again?" I won't have anything to wear! And of course her rebuttal is "You won't get fat! " Okay that makes since and I get that, these clothes are gonna sit here and take up space! As I talked to her with my "but, but , but" she was very strong in her "You don't need it" ...."You haven't worn it in 5 years" ..."It doesn't fit" ...."You're moving back to Florida you only need 6 sweaters! " welp lets stop right there Squirt! I know in Florida we have 4 seasons ...Hot, Hot, Hotter and semi- cool...BUT they also said when we moved here to North Carolina that it NEVER snows here! And guess what! IT SNOWED both years we lived here, and we even had to make up snow days! So WHAT IF it's a freak winter and it's cold!I may need more then 6 sweaters! GEEEZ (Good thing she lives several states away...and won't be counting the sweaters) But she was very convincing as I muttered about this and that, next thing I know I have 4 bags of clothes ready to donate!

WOW looks to me like I may be naked if the laundry doesn't get done! Good thing I have connections with the laundry Fairy!




I am running WHY?


Well since I was still awake at 5 am this morning I headed out the front door to hit the gym! Only to find that something had taken a liking to my trash and dragged it all over the lawn! WOW good thing it's 5 a.m I'd hate the neighbors to see what I didn't recycle! OOPS! So after I picked up all the icky trash headed back in washed my hands, and headed BACK out to drive to the gym...yes I know such determination......started driving and realized I didn't have my ipod and headphones! Oh the horror ...I can not go without those I'd be bored silly, and there's no one there to chat it up with of any interest at OH DARK THIRTY! So I headed back home, ran inside and started out again! Really should have just stayed in bed...but determined that's me! Delusional I am starting to think!

Thought I'd switch up my workout since I am gonna be a runner......hahahaha! I jumped on the dreaded treadmill cranked it up and walked , then during a commercial I tried running...yeah I really suck at running! I did 2 whole minutes! Wow and I want to do 3 miles! Yikes! So I decided I would run 2 minutes during commercial ...however the next commercial break came sooner then I'd like sooooooo I did 2 minutes every OTHER commerical break! Yep that's me the pro runner! Out of 40 minutes I ran a total of 6 whopping minutes! HA! Yep I suck! But I am gonna try again tomorrow ....maybe I can make it 2 1/2 minutes! Good thing I got 5 months to practice! And I am gonna have to get some running shoes, maybe some flats and heels to but for now.....I need running shoes!



Sleeping would be nice......


Well I think I was wrong in my last assessment about taking "hamster " off the menu! This morning "Tweety Bird" snatched "Padme" up by the neck, but when I screamed he dropped her! She landed on her back and was pretty much like a turtle, she's gotten so fat that she can't flip over by herself! But all in all she's fine! Whew ....good thing cause my little drama king would have been a nightmare!

I decided since I have been slacking on my workouts, that I needed to set a goal for myself! So I am entering a 5k in Florida. It's Nov. 22nd, only 2 days before my birthday..........My 29th birthday....... well 6th anniversary of my 29th birthday! Hubby said it sounded like a great idea, but did I realize I'd have to run! Slackers wisdom is always "Why would you run if no one was chasing you?" So I thought I could PRETEND all the people in the race were chasing me! I guess I need to learn "HOW" to run! I forget to breathe an I am no expert but I am sure you need to breathe.... so I think that should be my first step, but I figure I have 5 months to get ready and a 5k is only 3 1/2 miles.HA listen to me ONLY 3 1/2 miles...I already sound like a pro...a delusional pro ......... I'd no doubt drop dead if I did the Marathon of 26 miles! So now that I have officially said it, I will need to be reminded of my new goal, so I don't slack on it! Then again it is 3 in the morning, maybe I will have come to my senses by mid morning and delete this posting! Insomnia strikes again!



All this before 8 a.m????


What a morning! First I was in a dead sleep when I felt a horrible pain, it took me a moment...a SHORT moment to realize Caleb was asleep in my room and was tugging to flip his pillow...only the pillow wasn't what he was tugging! Yep he about ripped my boob right off! What a way to start my morning!

Since I was up and wide awake, I decided I'd hit the gym, no need to procrastinate, get it over and done! No one gets gussied up at 5:30 a.m that's for sure! The only interesting man I saw was camo boy! I wouldn't have been able to even see him , he was all in camo from head to toe.....the thing that caught my eye was the HOT PINK IPOD clipped to his hat! Don't get me wrong I am all for a splash of color...........

After showering, getting ready for the days I decided to start on some chores, laundry, dishes, you know the usual! When Caleb graced me with his presence this morning and it was only 7 a.m, we let "Padme" the hamster run around in her ball in the front room, while he watched cartoons and I went back to work doing chores......

I think I may need to put a bull's eye in the bottom of the toilet! Not sure who hasn't perfected their aim, my guess would be the boy....Dad has had many, many, many years of practice! (hehehehehe couldn't resist! ) Welp done with the bathroom I head to the kitchen where I FROZE! There was no Caleb but "Padme" and the 2 cats in the kitchen....only "Padme" was not in her ball any longer she was chillen with the cats! Really...they were sitten there!

I am starting to think the cats are not "REAL" cats! I mean they didn't eat the hamster, they like to play in the water! Pee Tree in the picture lets 'Padme" lay on her.... and "Tweety Bird" (I know ....no wonder the cat is confused with a name like that) likes salad and fruit, but I guess we can take "Hamster" off the menu...or maybe I just resuced her to quick!



Packing, Purging, Repeat ......


Yep that's what it seems like my days are full of Packing, Purging and Repeat......Packing a 2400 sq ft house and fitting it into a 1200 sq ft house seems like a trick even David Copperfiled couldn't manage! With the help of Craig's list, I have sold off a couch, end tables, tv and tv cabinet. The lady came with a Uhaul and a few buddies to load! If I would have known that I wouldn't have dragged my "Borrowed husband" (Hi Al) over to help carry the TV and cabinet outta my room while the hubby was at work! So now with an empty front room I have been putting boxes there that are packed and ready to be loaded, and I am sadly disappointed that there are only 28 packed boxes in that room! I swear I feel like I've packed more ...I must be thinking of the ones I dropped off at Goodwill, cause I have been packing FOREVER and a DAY so I know there should be more then 28 *&^%ING boxes!



A seasoned camper


Yep that's me a seasoned camper! And I learned a few more things on this adventure.........When I returned back to camp to our Charlie Brown tent, one of the guys upgraded me...he had a 6 man tent an extra one! Who brings and extra tent? Thank God he did, and someone else had an extra tarp that goes underneath...in case it rains. Well my thoughts on that is if it starts raining I will hightail it outta here!

It was a boys dream out there, bugs, tents, holes in the ground to pee in....on purpose! Apparently that's a big hit with the boys...........they ran to get flashlights to see the "stuff" better that is down in that hole....ewwww I didn't dare go in that room!Gotta be a boy thing! BB gun range, archery, BMX, skateboarding, they had it all! And then there's me....although I was NOT the only mom there, only one in our troop, but not the only one. However a huge difference between me and the other mom's ....they enjoy camping! And we know my view on it!

After the first night , sleeping on just blankets my back was killing me, my entire body felt like I had been hit by a semi truck! After my endless whining about how sore I was ......hubby and I went to get a pump for the upgraded tent! A pump for the queen size blow up mattress! AHHHHH that was heaven....well at least from the night before on the hard ground, a nice cozy mattress! It would be great if the failing child wasn't swinging his arms and legs while he tosses and turns...but I did get some shut eye on the 2nd night, in between his endless sleep chatter! Night 3 it starts to rain......my plan to high tail it outta there is foiled due to my little "woodsman" wants to STAY! So we stay....it drizzles so it's not bad because it stops, and we are dry. They cancel the nighttime events and we end up playing Light Up Frisbee, in the pitch black forest til after 10 pm! Talk about dark and wild! You just see this flying light heading straight for you! But that was fun! You learn to duck when it whacks a few people in the head!

Welp this morning started like every morning......5:30 am the annoying birds decide everyone should wake up now! And they get louder and louder with each and every whistle! Caleb has the blanket wrapped up over his head and trying to turn out the bright sun and annoying birds while he continues to get some shut eye. Ahhh last morning here, I have survived the camping trip and it was actually fun!

UNTIL.....the ranger rides up at 7:30am to say everyone should start packing up, and take tents down we have a huge storm coming our way! Everyone scrambled and we wake the kids and get them dressed, stuff packed and WHAM....it starts to pour! I have a very stylish purple poncho on..........it doesn't really keep you dry! That is false advertising! I was soaked! We all were racing around tryen to get the tents down, I was the first tent down...yes me I am the "Tent Master" probably since I had the smallest tent but hey...It was the first one down! So take that BOYS! HA!



Men and shopping..........


Good God now I remember WHY husbands should not be let loose in the grochie store! His rebuttal is that we have some "GOOD STUFF TO EAT" ......not sure if we can make many meals with the "good stuff"! 2 carts and CHOKE $200 dollar later! I wasn't prepared at all with my coupons , it was a spur of the moment to hit the store..NOT A GOOD IDEA! Think a half pint of GELATO Ice cream at 800 calories a pint! He will be putting himself in food coma by the time Caleb and I get back from camping on Tuesday morning!
Yes I said camping....that dreaded day has come....we got him all set up this morning at the camp site! Poor Caleb, we look like we have a Charlie Brown tent, hell I think Charlies xmass tree was bigger then this little tent! I didn;t want to borrow a tent again, so it'll be a tight squeeze! Good thing I'm "child size " now....at least that's what my girlfriend's husband said....yea same one who thinks I should go "BUC WILD" at the BK to gain a few pounds! Anyways it should be cozy I'll let ya know as night one of my camping adventure will be on it's way!

Good times.......


Oh how exciting today is the last day of school. And not only is it the LAST day of school it's also a HALF day of school! Oh I can hardly contain my excitement! IT just brings me that much closer to our Saturday camping trip! OH JOY!

I found the gym and while I did the first part of my workout white knuckled with a death grip on the handles after my knock down, drag out fight first thing in the morning with my little darling...I felt much better afterwards! He got a hair cut that afternoon, I was sure under that mop of hair there would be little devil horns hiding, but much to my surprise there wasn't! He was a tad annoyed with his hair cut thou, he asked for a Mohawk......and came to me with a crew cut and says " Does this look like a Mohawk to you? " At least he said it to me.
One time while getting a hair cut the lady asked "How do you like it" And his simple response was " Lady I don't think you know what you're doing! This don't look nothen like a crew cut"! Yes he is such a joy at the barber......Another time while he was 4 he came in sat down and started flipping through the Maxime Magazine (men's magazine)while I tried to deter him with the Barney books they had he was much more interested In his current choice! I was horrified when he opened it up to announce.... "Mommy she has panties just like you look! " in his loud little boy voice that can be heard for miles as he giggled.....then to add to my horror he starts to giggle again and says "Look mommy she don't got a bra on!" As I am wrangling the magazine away from him a old bitty that works there snaps at me" MISS there are appropriate things he can read right over there! " MY immediate response as I held the barney books up was " YES I know! But obviously they aren't as interesting as what he is reading NOW! " Yes ....good times are had at the barber shop!



'How To"


I think I may need to write a "How to guide" "How to NOT strangle your child" .......
Or maybe I need to read one! Counting is not working because I don't even think I can count that high! And just think in 2 more days it's summer......He will be home, all day, all night....oh good lord help me now! Luckily he is signed up for lots of half day camps....may need to make those full days! Seriously we are to much alike! We both need to be right , and well I'm the mom so therefore I AM RIGHT! Really this child will be a lawyer , or on America's Most Wanted! Breathe.....Breathe...... Breathe......After I drop him off at school ( I will try to remember to STOP the car, and not just push him out!) I will head to the gym, where I will work off my aggravation while white knuckling the handles of the glider, pretending that is Caleb's little neck! That should make me feel better! And that way I won't end up in jail! So that'll work! Hopefully I will remember where the gym is, I skipped all week , due to being sick , hoping to make my workout with out hacking on anyone! Oh but I need a good sweat session because I am ready to snap! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH it'll be a long summer! Boot camp? Do you think I could sign him up for bootcamp? hummmmmmm something to look into! And just think It's only 7:00 a.m. ughhhhhhhh



Bridezilla............



OMG! I have never seen the show "Bridezilla" before! I never even watched a "Wedding story" Or any of the other wedding shows for that matter, before we got married! But today I stumbled on "Bridezilla" an not just a show a marathon! I can't turn away!HA HA neither can hubby! Oh how sad! We haven't figured out WHY someone would marry someone like that! If you haven't seen it......ya need to watch! These gals are CRAZY! Really they should be happy someone is actually marring them! Just goes to show how LUCKY hubby is! And as we watch this I certainly do remind him! But in between commercials I did get some packing done, some house hunting and some mom nagging! Gotta go cause the new season "Bridezilla" is getting ready to start! Oh how sad am I! Well hubby too! HA!



Betty Crocker strikes again.....


UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM COOKIES! Yes Betty Crocker (AKA hubby) was a baking fool! Of course it was MY bright idea that we make cookies for ALL of Caleb's teacher( Art, science, music ect) ! And a few extra so he made about 10 dozen! Now I have to bag them ...."One for you...One for me"! I made cute little bags with thank yous from Caleb and they are hole punched on to the bag with fancy ribbon! And of course for his main teacher I had to make not only cookies , but come up with a clever basket ...(which of course I did) because every holiday we've made her one , she carries on how cool it is! As if it won;t be! GEEZ she doesn't know who she's talken about huh! The queen of clever! I have to say my will power with the cookies has been amazing! Of course they are on a shelf WAY to high for me to reach, with out pulling a chair over, climbing on top of the counter, standing up and reaching to get to the top shelf! Seems like to much work .....Outta site ....Outta mind! Well until after we get home from church , then I will be bagging them! ..................One for you , One for me.......One for you ..........two for me!



Such willpower!


Welp I came to my senses and didn't get my free donut for National Donut Day! Actually my tummy was screaming YES! YES! YES...and my thighs were yelling NO! NO! NO! So the thighs won, I don't need any more giggle down there especially since it's summer! You walk around half naked in bathing suits for all the world to see, your every wiggle, and jiggle so in the end I decided NOT to participate ! I know such willpower right? Yeah I know! Actually the car line was to long, and so was the line inside! But hey....still such willpower! I think I will hold out for free shoe day!
I'll stand in line for that!
Caleb was awarded the "Individuality" Award at school to day? Guess they have learned yep, he is his own little person!Ms. Kitty his 2 year old preschool teacher who was about 90 lbs and 4'9 and about 70 years old! Loved her! She was a retired teacher at 35 years and came back to be with kids. Yes she was a saint, because when I am 70 I plan on avoiding children and traveling the world, laughing at Caleb since I am sure his children will be as bad as he is....( We know this since I am being paid back!) Anyways she called me in one day to chat about "How wonderful Caleb was, what a joy he is in class, how he was such a leader and not a follower" OKAY ....so I'm waiting for the "BUT" part of this conversation when she said....."But, he needs to know I am in charge not him! I need to be the leader ...not him! Later in life he will be in charge...BUT NOT NOW! " WEll 6 years later at 8 he still hasn't figured out he's not in charge!



National Donut Day


Did you know it is National Donut Day! I mean what a special occasion! You get free donuts, I could plug that in to my GPS and hit all the Krispy Kremes and Dunkin Donuts for my FREE donut! Ahhhhh what a holiday! I better go while supplies last...........



Hacker Girl


Welp I have been for going the gym the last week or so, mainly so I am not dubbed as "Hacker Girl" or hack up a lung while on the glider! My diet is consistent of cough drops and hot tea. Goodie for me I had all those coupons for FREE cough drops and I stocked up! Now I'm on antibiotics that I am to stay outta the sun while I am on it for the next 10 days....ughhh yeah it's summer, the pools open and I have an 8 year old boy! Sure I can stay outta the sun! I do however feel like I have been doing mega AB crunches....my stomach and sides are so sore from all this hacking I am doing! SO who knows maybe I'll have that 6 pack off abs after all!
My brain isn't functioning either looking for my glasses only to realize yep they on top of my head already and then ........ as I just made Caleb's breakfast, there I am with the bagel in hand buttering it up , when I noticed .................I just put frosting ...vanilla butter cream frosting on his bagel...on the last bagel in the house! UGHHH Really I may need to go back to bed and start over!