Its a Dog Thang ........

Roxie and Bubba Lou
As my fur baby Jack approaches his first birthday, it makes me think back and reminisce about Bubba Lou and Roxie, my first fur babies that I had before the hubster and I had started dating. I do have them to thank for bringing us together thou!

Along, long, long time ago when I had moved out of Mama Pepper’s house into my own, my dad got me a puppy!! Isn’t that what every new home owner needs?? A puppy to pee on the freshly laid carpet, chew on the freshly painted walls, why yes of course!! Roxie was a 3 month old Rottweiler, looking ever so fashionable in her diamond stud hot pink collar (pink ...shocking I know)!! About a month after I had Roxie another pup showed up at the house, a skinny, starving pup that would come and play with Roxie, cuddle with me and follow us around the neighborhood, never leaving my side. He would knock on the door with his paw, like a little kid to announce he was here and ready to play, and he never left! So then there were two, and we (me and Roxie) name him “Bubba Lou”. It was obvious that he had not only been starved, but beaten, because a slight raise in your voice he would flip over and shake and pee all over!!! Yes just what every new homeowner needs is not one but two puppies, and one that pees when he gets scared!!

I learned quickly that having puppies …….was a big and expensive job! And that having 2 puppies meant I had an even a bigger and more expensive mess!! I was a college student, working at the local sports bar on the weekends and a mom of 2 growing pups…… who created mischief and mayhem on a daily basis!! Coming home to the house newly decorated in pillow stuffing, toilet paper, shoes and anything else they could manage to find!!

I came home to red lipstick that had been chewed up on my light gray carpet!! OH MY GOD I screamed as I walked in the door ….and well there went Bubba Lou…… so now I had not only red stained carpet but it was now soaked in pee……. calling the carpet cleaners, and spending my tip money for that night I now had nice clean carpets again. Well until the next night when I came home from work to discover that they had eaten the ink cartridge outta my printer all over the nice clean carpets …………OH MY GOD ………here we go again!! After the carpet guys left yet again I decided I needed to do something …….so I found a doggie sitter while I worked!!

I had a really sweet neighbor that lived outback, she had a little girl and lived with a man that I grew up with his kids, and he helped her out. She loved the dogs and was wonderful with them, would take them out on walks, bring them treats, and then...a few moths into this arrangement  I started noticing she was borrowing my clothes …like I’d come home and notice her outside and think hummm that looks like my shirt, dress, purse etc. !! The straw that broke the camel’s back was coming home to her sitting at my makeup table, doing her makeup, curling her hair and wearing my clothes …….I stood at my bedroom door in pure shock as she spun around and said “oh I hope you don’t mind, I had nothing to wear and Howard is picking me up to go shopping” My mouth hit the floor as I said “Howard …as in Howard dad??” WTF?? Yea…”Howard” and I had to have a chat …there is a golden rule all fathers should know……… you don’t date someone YOUNGER than your own kids!!!! After that awkward encounter , I took my key back from the psycho dog sitter, along with my clothes and I needed a new plan!!

One night the dynamic duo jumped out of my picture window!! They didn’t mean to do it , they were obviously excited about whatever was lurking outside and jumped up against the window, how would they realize that they were now both over 100 pounds and the window would come crashing down??

Oh yes, the joys of having 2 pups!! Stocking the (pre) hubster, whose brother happen to also work with me at the Sports Bar, I called in a panic that he needed to come fix my window – the dogs jumped out of it!!! He did construction there (and other places) at the time, and so lucky for me here was there!! He came over with that sexy tool belt, some plywood and patch it up!! Then the next day returned to put in the window!! I think he is convinced that I pushed the window out …….just so he’d show up to be my night and shining amour!! He then came back and put up a fence for me, to help contain my wild beasts!! I remember sitting there on the back steps with (pre) hubster, trying to pay him for putting the fence up and he wouldn’t take it ….I replied with “You better take it now, because when I marry you, I won’t pay you to do things around the house!”, then I asked him to be my date to a wedding and the rest is history- we’ve been together ever since! Poor guy , if he only knew his fate ......back in 1997, he may have taken that sexy tool belt and ran the other way!

He continued to be my night and shining amour coming to the aid of my distress signals, bringing pliers in the middle of the night to retrieve what was left of the rat’s head from the vent, as it tried to escape the hunt of the pups and …..well lost!!! that was gross!! You know your man is a keeper when he gets outta bed, drives all the way over to crazy dog -lady's house with that sexy tool belt and removes the rat head and body from a vent!

Pre- hubster should have known he was doomed, when I introduced myself to his parents at the bar before we even started dating as “Hi, I’m Pepper – I’ll be your server tonight and your daughter in law someday when I marry your son”! His mother replied with a big grin and just said “I hope you do”.

See…….what I mean Bubba Lou and Roxie helped bring us together!! We had many, many adventures with the kids, and even more when PC was born as they lived to the ripe old age of 15! Which is amazing when you think about it for big dogs! Once the hubster and I moved in together they became “outside dogs” since they were huge lap dogs (120+ and 140+ lbs) ….. and we lived in a tiny house! I cried the first few nights, and thought it was so mean of him to make them be outside, but then I realized that they loved it, and hey the house was a hell of a lot cleaner!!

Bubba Lou, even after being by my side for 15 years never got over the whole flipping and peeing thing when he was scared, but he did get over being starved as he rounded out at a plump 140 + pounds!! PC was 6 when Roxie passed in her sleep and Bubba Lou followed about 4 months later with a broken heart, which is what I was then left with.

Bubba Lou Me and Roxie 2000  
I never imaged finding myself with another “set” of dogs that I could adore (even with all the mayhem they would cause)  as much as I did Bubba Lou and Roxie, but I have to say that after being dog-less for 7 years, I have once again found that unconditional love and joy you get from a dog, that wag of a tail, just because you came around the corner, and that happy to see you grin with my Jack and Jill! Who knows maybe it's  Bubba and Roxie back home  again in smaller bodies this they can be inside and be once again spoiled dogs!!

Jack , Me and Jill 2014
Really the only people that will understand this……. are that of a true dog lover! All others may just think I am that crazy dog lady ….which ….yea there’s that to!!  Now if you'll excuse me............ I have a wet Jack to go dry off!!

Happy 1st Birthday my fur baby Jack! May you have many butts to sniff and bones to chew!

Why Change Things...

I am not one that embraces change, I mean really if its going well why change it? If it ain't broke.....don't fix it?? I suppose it is good that things change or I would still be reaching for the RAVE hairspray and blow dryer in the morning and have really big Texan hair ( and in case you didn't know........I love big hair). With any luck maybe someday it will be back "in-style" ......much like everything making a comeback these days .........kinda like "tube tops" which really ......should have stayed hidden!!  

So why am I suddenly doing things that require changing my ways? I'm not sure, maybe I'm trying to go with the flow, accept the things I can not change (now I sound like an AA meeting) and I am learning to embrace change. Or maybe it’s the fact that I will be 29 (+ 10+ 1) this year…….(hopefully none of you are good at math and just gloss over the extra equation added in) and I figure if not now ...then when? I have been doing things this year that push me outside of my comfort zone ALOT. One of my personal  goals I set for myself this year was to work on public speaking. I didn’t write it down, I just had that little fact tumbling around in my head! Anyone that knows me….can tell you I am not at all shy – but the thought of standing up and presenting and speaking with all eyes on me….. AHHHHHH yeah that scares me!!! Even if I am picturing people naked …. Yep- still nervous and now a little freaked out because really …not everyone is meant to be pictured naked!!!!

Changes ahead are rapidly approaching as my work life will be topsy turvy, with bossman retiring soon.....according  to his countdown app he has 84 days left! I love that I have a bossman that lets me be me, he lets me show my "delightful (hahahahaha) and colorful" personality ...and by colorful I mean my whole friggen work area is PINK, HIGH HEELS and PIGS!! He doesn't make me tone it down.......he actually adds to it! One year he even bought me a Christmas Pig Yard Ornament .....pretty sure he thought it would be in my own front yard ....nope - I had other plans. I busted that sucker open, named him Preston Pig and he became the office mascot, who BTW is very well know at work! After Christmas came and went bossman looked at me and said ....."Preston can't stay it still looks like Christmas" .....hummmmm so what I heard was "Preston COULD stay if he didn't look like Christmas" ...that was 2 Christmases ago, Preston Pig now has his own wardrobe cabinet and even his own "Hog-a-day" Card! It will be a sad day when bossman retires ~ and I hate it! But I am trying to embrace change, change is good right? Isn't that what they say? Seriously? I still think it sucks ass - but I guess after 35 years he deserves it.

On a whim, I entered an essay contest about becoming an Avery Brand (Office Products) Ambassador (spokes person), which in turn they would send me FREE (who doesn't love free)  office products to sample, and presentation material that I would need to present to different groups, have a website and do social media post, etc. The contest runs until the end of June 2015 and the winner gets I believe $5000 cash - heck yeah!!! Sounded like a great idea when I signed up.....and I viewed it as another way to work on my public speaking skills...(not to mention I could by alotta shoes with that kind of cash). When I got the letter that I was selected .....I was excited ....and then.......I thought "Oh shit ...what did I get myself into now"? Which has pretty much been my response to a lot of things I have done lately!!   Like my new party adventure as a Pure Romance Consultant! I am super excited (and not just because I get boxes of .....errrrr .and the mail ~ however that is a bonus) but because this is a new, (yet VERY scary ) adventure ~ where once again I am outside my comfort zone- pushing my limits!  I have found that the other reps not only in the area but all around  are like a new found sisterhood ~ everyone is so supportive and helpful (amazing when you think about it ...... it's all women and no one is clobbering someone over the head with their shoe).

Taking the plunge is the only way I will discover new things and I think this could be an amazing new chapter to add to my 29 (+10+1) years. And if I don't try it would I ever know what will happen?? So here's to embracing change......and all the WTF's that are coming my way (including that big +1 that is rapidly approaching in November)!   


Ready To Party????

OMG- where did June go?? Did I blink and we are now in July already?? WTH?? Next time I blink it'll be December!!! Ughh Well lets fast forward and just say that I was the one (and not the hubster)  who caved and allowed technology back into the house (and Hubster did set a timer for it to shut off - bad part of that ... is those nights with insomnia ... and I have no internet!!! And like now I am currently racing a midnight cut off!!! Ahhhhhh ). But it really is like having my very own minion, allowing computer time.

PC:  "Please mom, can I please earn some computer time??"
ME: "Well the floors need to be vacuumed"
PC: "Ok now can I?"
ME: "Looks like the laundry needs to be taken to the laundry room, oh and the garbage's need to be empty ...all of them, oh and don't forget the dishwasher. Make sure to empty and reload it!!! " 
PC: (surely gritting his teeth as he says ok) "OK mom ....all my chores are done, can I PLEASE go on the computer now"

ME: "Sure you have 45 minutes."
PC: "WHAT - after all that?? No I need more time"
ME: " Now you have 30 minutes"
PC: " What? Wait - No - Wait I will take the 45 minutes"

Kudos that he and hubster have been going to the gym at least 4 nights a week ( way more then my lazy muffin top self has been doing) and he is swimming with Jack our water boy daily and well "was" going to Mama Peppers and helping, but somehow he weaseled his way out of doing that!! But he leaves on Sunday to go to the mountains with Mama Pepper....and Witness Protection should be here Monday morning to relocate the Hubster and I!!!

Lets see.... Recap of June...........

1. Jill - the trouble maker has developed a love for my plants ...and YES don't worry folks  they are "Dog Friendly" as they jump right outta the pot and display themselves all over the deck....but look at that face on her!!! I think she is totally mocking me!!!

2.I cut all my hair off (ummm still not sure I like it)  ...and my minion also got 6 inches cut of his...for computer time.....(insert evil laugh here )

3. Went to Drag Queen BINGO- with the "Dirty Bitches" (catch phrase from DQB) from work  - and that was a riot!!! We will have to do that again...even if its just to call the others "Dirty Bitches" and to toss our none winning BINGO card at the winner as they circle around the bar!

4. Jack and Jill went up the hill ....well really around the bed like pro race car drivers, and Mom (aka Me)  fell down tumbling after them... landing on my knee ...OUCH -long story short ....3 weeks of hobbling, saw the young, hot ortho doctor yesterday and today was the 1st day I woke up without pain!! Love those cortizone shots!!!

5. After attending a very entertaining and fun-tab-u-lous  "Pure Romance Party" I have taken the plunge and signed up to be a consultant (click here to see my website they give you) !! So what does that mean to you?? Well .... for all you local buddies that may read this dribble I write - it means that YOU will be invited to a Launch Party (so I can practice - making you OHHHH and AHHHHH and say WTF does that do??) ....and that YOU will have so much fun laughing, giggling and just about ready to pee your pants fun ....... that YOU will beg for me to come and do a party at your house - with all your girlfriends!!!And that YOU will earn FREE STUFF .... for having a good ol' time at your house, with your friends! All you need to do is invite a few friends, have some finger foods, and some cocktails ...and let the fun begin!!!

All those non-local peeps that may come across this ................. hey some day I will  travel ... ...eventually ~ we can always do a catalog party, Facebook party... ...if you see something that may ...well Tickle Your Fancy! Pun, very much intended! HAHAHHAAHA

Guess what else?? NO MEN or CHILDREN are allowed!!! REALLY??? Yep that's right!!! They are NOT ALLOWED..... (yep those are the rules) .... How Fab-Tab-U-LOUS is that?? ( oh ....whoops....sorry.. ..Hubster... you can play later)! So after I figure out what all this fun-tab-u-lous "stuff actually is and does"  (OMG - seriously?? WTH is some of this stuff) ...Anyways it'll be game on!! And don't worry's not just "Those kind of toys (although really what more could you need) ...but they have bath and beauty products, lotions, lubes and!!!"

And NOPE  you wont see any of these items at the next Yard Sale at Mama Peppers (more rules on that) ....although they would go nicely with the "Astro Glide, mini massager,  pregnancy test and diapers that we had).So all you men that aren't allowed share this with your ladies.. so they can get busy booking parties!!!