Craft-tastic Times

I had a buddy ask me to post some of my projects I have worked on and finally my craft table is clean ..er... ..(hahaha) well it's cleaner ....then it was...or then it has been .......okay okay I still have a lot of shit on the craft-tastic table but I've been uber busy with projects over the last few months!! But I finally can see a semi- clean spot ~  Between hosting and /or attending baby showers, birthday celebrations and the school's silent auction baskets  I have been busy being Crafty!!! From diaper cakes, invites, and then I got on a roll making all types of bouquets.

Give me some wooden sticks and my glue gun add a few mini bottles of booze, shoot glasses,  make up, onesies, washcloths, soaps, rubber ducky ....anything I could get my hands on will work. ...and you get these fun-tab-u-lous little gifts!!!

Who's Your Daddy??

"Who's your babies Daddy"?? Well that is the question these days.... And I am referring to my baby Jack and not PC!! So we know that Jack is a "Border Collie Mix" but what is he mixed with?? We have heard it all from Lab, Terrier, Pointer Dog, Dalmatian oh and my personal favorite St. Friggen Bernard..... THAT seems to be the favorite comparison people have!! Are they nuts??? They poop things bigger than Jack out on a daily basis so here's hoping its not St. friggen Bernard!!! Hummmm so who do you think Jack's Daddy could be?? I am thinking he looks like the "Pointer Dog" and he even does that pointy thing with his tail.....when he is chasing everything that runs.... really they all start to look alike after awhile don't they??

Back in the day it really wouldn't matter what Jack was mixed with, he'd just be a " Border Collie Mix" a.k.a. " Mutt" and that would be that.....but now a days people just wanna know ..... and can you believe they offer DNA testing for DOGS!!! WTH?? Are you kidding me??? DNA testing for a dog?? Do you really need to know that bad??? Well apparently if I do there are several options ranging from $30 - 150.00 and I'd learn Jack's heritage maybe even who his grand pups were! 

Would it be reliable? From reading various reviews I'd say no, and do I really need to know? Nope I don't! I could buy to many pairs of shoes for the cost of a DNA test for my pup!!! OR I could pick up something for my little Jack - yep I am quickly becoming one of "those people" ...... I can't resist picking up a new bandana, bone or a squeaky toy....after all he is the one who is happy to see me every time I enter the room whether I am gone for 10 seconds or 8 hours! That tail wag just melts your heart!!!

So far the genius four legged baby has been to 2 puppy training classes and has master the art of "Sitting" ...especially sitting in front of the dog trainer with the treat cup hooked to her hip... so "Sitting" and "Barking" at her to give him a treat because HELLO.... he is sitting!!!! So we are working on "Watch Me" ... yea he is watching you all right, watching to make sure you get that friggen treat out fast or we will start "Barking"!!! But he is learning... he has learned which door is to the pantry at home and hey... isn't that where we keep his treats??? Why yes it is... just look at that tail go!!!

We also have learned "Leave it" hummm we have yet to master that as I was pulling a FLAT DEAD crunchy TOAD out of his mouth this morning!!! EWWWW I'd rather go back to crunchy worms!!! Yuck!!

I know all I need to know about Jack, he is here to stay.....even if he's riding the short bus in puppy training class!!!

ALSO hoping that Jack is in NO relation to a NEWFOUNDLAND DOG!!! I may need to get that DNA testing after all!!!

JUST ONE

In the early years of Prince Charming everyone always had a comment and the age old question of ......."Oh......when will you have another" or "Oh…. he needs a brother or sister to play with - he can’t be an only child" (almost like it is a disease).  My usual responses were to the point and very matter of fact....some examples:

1. "NEVER- are you crazy have you met this child- one is more than enough for me"

2. "I was an only child...and look how perfect I turned out! Why spoil it by adding another in the mix? "

3."HA- you couldn't pay me to have another!”

4." And who would be paying for this addition? Should I send the bills to you?"

Other examples contained extremely colorful sentence enhancers especially if “we” (me and the gem) had a rough day - which was known to happen on occasion!

I am sure I have many more, because in 12 years it has been asked more than a zillion times!!! Usually I toss in a reason or two as why PC is more than enough....like the time I got up to make a bottle and came back to our living room and the 7 month old baby was gone... as in missing... as in I turned my back for not even 60 seconds to go 2 feet away while he played with his toys on the floor. Yepper he was gone in a flash! I could hear giggling and a clinking noise as I frantically searched the tiny living room for my tiny human ....I turned around to see that my sweet angle (bahahaha) had OPENED  the CHILDPROOF lock on the gate that surrounded the fireplace and he SHUT it behind him, as he took the broom and was swinging it above his head... as he sat in the fireplace giggling.... covered in soot!! Yes there was my messy bundle of joy ... in the fireplace...and you think I should have an accomplice for him to play with?? WTF are you thinking???

Or how about the fact that he was walking at 9 months old so by the time he was a year old he was more like a 3 year old and jumping off the tops of the jungle gym, racing around the other “non-walkers” and grabbing their “corks”! And by “corks” I mean their pacifiers!!! He thought the sound that those wee ones would make was hysterical because he would race by them, grab that cork and pull and off he would go while the siren (or screaming child) would go off! Yes, I was quite a popular mom at the playground that’s for sure! How about the time we got kicked out of “Story Time” at the public library, seriously?? Who bands a child who is not even a year old from attending story time?? Don’t you want him to grow up and be an avid reader??  Apparently the evil librarian who told me “If you cannot control your child, you cannot attend story time!”.  Really the problem was PC would run up to knock on the castle door to see the puppets come out instead of the bitter old hag (aka evil librarian)! Who can blame him?

How about this one… First ER visit.....